# Chapter 120

The Thanksgiving lunch bash with the whole York crew went surprisingly well. I was so relived that this it did for Brenda’s sake. She put so much work and thought and effort into the day, and the kids were pretty decent in the whole process. But the fact that that they all came and were well behaved and did all the things that she wanted them to do was a big win. Why do we put so much pressure on these social constructs? Why do we expect so much from people in these situations?

Well we want and hope for more and better from them. High expectations aren’t evil in any way. And she got what she wanted! If we had aimed for my low bar of expectations for 5 small children, I am sure we would have received that too, but it would have been much less. Nothing big to shoot for. No stretch for anyone. This was way better and I am properly shamed that I did not ask for more, and thrilled that Brenda did. She accomplished a great deal in their lives and futures yesterday, while I did not.

There are a number of great lessons here. First of all is aim high and live with whatever disappointments that come. Racing to the bottom of lowest expectations isn’t going to help anyone dream and be inspired. Second of all, even Neanderthal’s can be inspired by someone like my wife, as my expectations were more along their Neanderthal natures and general possibilities, but they all surprised me in the end. Three, expect more from yourself.