# Chapter 187

Pause before speaking, pause or pay the stupid tax. This is another gem from Lincoln. Don’t answer immediately. Wait before you answer. This is the power of the pause. Give yourself a few cotton-picking minutes to think before you pay the stupid tax. This is the way to operate most strategically. Delay is your friend here. If you wait a while, a good pause or delay or break, takes all the emotion out of your answer. It allows you to not break things nor relationships with your quick thoughtless replies. While you may win some small kudos for being quick on your feet, it generally costs you far more in damage and mistakes.

Many of my friends and acquaintances bemoan the fact that they think of the right answer long after their conversation has finished. They should be most thankful for that, instead of being disappointed in their failure to pop off some flippant comeback in a verbal tussle. If you plan want or intend to lead, your pause should be automatic and planned. This is the only way to move forward and preserve all your relationships and plans. This is the way to be a statesperson within your field or vocation. At the end of the day, most everyone wants to be led or under the authority of a thoughtful person who gives a measured response.

While the flippant quick answer person who takes no guff is the life of the party and plenty fun to be around in the right context, this is not the person we want to lead our organizations, our teams, our communities.