Chapter 183

Changing a mind is difficult work.

It is also ever challenging work. Please understand that we are not talking about force here. Nor are we talking about evangelistic conversations or any thing religious. Neither are we talking about overwhelming someone with loads of information and data. And do not think of this as the 180 degree variety of change, but rather incremental adjustments. Most people cannot manage quick large degree changes in their positions or mental constructions.

We are talking about persuasion, clarity and excitement. We are talking about relationship, community and interlocking social circles. This is the context in which changing a mind can happen. It takes time and then some more time. If you are a strong personality beware. You can win the argument and still lose. Still not change the mind in truth. Your heavy-handed-ness is usually a negative in this battle.

The point is not agreement on some point, its not that kind of changing the mind. Its helping them make an internal adjustment so that they can say no to things that harm them, yes to practices that help them, and narratives to win the day. They are the one’s who benefit from this mind-changing, not me or my group or tribe. In fact the whole point of this chapter is that, helping someone change their mind to their own benefit is powerful fulfilling work.

You do this all the time already, every time you show someone how to do something they are already doing, but better and easier, and suddenly they acknowledge that your way is better for them. You just changed their minds.

Now do it on purpose!